Keep the Home Fires Burning: Sexual Healing

Stress levels are high these days. Some of us have lost jobs, are afraid of losing jobs, or have close friends and family who have lost jobs. Everyone is worried about money to some degree. There's uncertainty and tension everywhere you look.

All this attention to worry might have left you giving little attention to other pursuits - like sex. But forgetting to give attention to your partner can lead to more stress, and that creates problems. If you are able to switch gears and forget worry for a bit, you can create a bit of sexual healing.

How can you do this when you're stressed and distracted all the time? That's a challenge, we know. But learning how to switch gears is an essential component to bringing back the romance and even affecting a little sexual healing.

Let's look at some ways to make this happen.

Make a cut-off each day

Easier said than done, to be sure, but this can be done with some focus and consistency. Decide on a time each day (perhaps around 9) when work and chores should be done. By this time, you should be done thinking about money, fretting over the job, or worrying about anything else.

Consider coming up with a formal transition each day. Perhaps at 9, you get in the bathtub and read a book. That signals that you are ready for other pursuits beyond the worries of the day.

Spice it up

When romantic endeavors are consistent from encounter to encounter, it's easy to get bored and allow worry to take over these activities. But if you do some things to spice it up, you might see sex as a welcome escape from the troubles of the day.

What entails spicing things up will vary from person to person, and couple to couple, of course, but consider adding toys or different positions. You might even consider a weekend where you send the kids away and reconnect with your partner sexually and romantically, sparking more interest beyond that weekend.

Speed it up

When life gets busy, it can be easy to let romance fall by the wayside, because there "just isn't time" but if you make time, you'll find that you want to make time more often. While a true quickie isn't for everyone, it can be a way to build more romantic and sexual connection, which often begets more and more romantic and sexual connection.

Or slow it down

The flip side of this is where the connections and healing can take place. When you slow down and really take time to enjoy being with your partner, you can begin to find some solace in that connection and be reminded of why you found comfort in your partner in the first place.

Take the time every now and then (at least once a month, but ideally more often) to slow down and enjoy every inch of your partner. Relish the sensations and the connection and relax into the comfort of having a loving partner to come home to each night.

by Deb McLeod